Moonlight and Stars in your Strawberry Wine

Yesterday marked the 41st year I have spent on the earth. It has been seven years since I decided, after a long layoff, to get back into freelancing.

I would have to sit down and count but I think I have written somewhere between 15-20 screenplays on assignment since then and maybe two or three specs. I have about a half-dozen or so you can go out and get on the shelves with a few more in the chute. But every year on my birthday and evaluate where I am and whether I want to go one more year.

In 2006 I took a year off from writing. I had just changed jobs/careers and coupled that with some family issues. Last December I decided to pick up the pen again and was surprised to find that there were still people wanting to work with me after my self-imposed exile. Since December I have done SPLINTERHEAD and NEW JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH for Polonia Brothers Entertainment, PRIMAL for director Michael Su (which has since come out, minus my rewrite, but that's how it goes sometimes), MENTAL SCARS for producer Richard Myles, and am working on URAMESHIYA/GHOST SCREAM for director Amit Tripuraneni, with another secret project in the offing. I have worked pretty steadily since I started back up, pretty much picking up right where I left off.

This year I want to expand my base a little bit and look harder at other elements of the writing world I have been interested in. To that end I started keeping a new blog, THE HOMEMADE WORLD REVIEW, which you can check out here. Hopefully you will see more efforts in the coming months.

I had a nice birthday. I got some after shave and a new wallet and some clothes, and a gift certificate to "Books A Million" from my daughter. We had pizza with my parents and then went to the home opening football game of my alma mater in their shining new stadium. But they broke my heart, losing by one in the waning seconds.

Until next year, give me a shout at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Ghostbusters 3

It's good to feed the muse once in a while. My wife and I made a quick trip up to Chicago and checked out the Art Institute. This is a great place that has such works as Edward Hopper's Nighthawks and Grant Wood's American Gothic. If you have ever played the game "Masterpiece" you know what I'm talking about.

More Art

Here we are in front of the Dayton Art Insitute in Dayton, Ohio. There was some interesting art, and a really good asparagus and blue cheese soup there in the cafe.

Up, Up and Away

A pretty cool sculpture that is a tribute to the Wright Brothers, at the Dayton Art Institute. This is my new desktop background.

Sure As You Can't Steer A Train, You Can't Change Your Fate

I saw THE LIVES OF OTHERS the other night and thought, damn I wish I had written that. Even though I don't know German.

Meanwhile, and I knew this day was coming, you can get several of my movies in dollar bins nationwide. As reported by Tim at the Polonia Brothers Fan Club, double DVDs of FEEDERS/AMONG US and HOLLA IF I KILL YOU/PETER ROTTENTAIL are cropping up in Dollar Stores across this great land. I grabbed myself one of each already.

Check out my pal Amit Tripuraneni's new movie FIVE here, with the first couple of minutes posted online. Looks like they shot the eyes out of this one. This will be playing at Microcinema Fest in a few short sweet weeks.

The return of mom and pop video stores? It does my heart (and my career) good.

Empire Star

A while back I wrote how I would love to go to Nigeria and become the William Goldman of the Nigerian film industry. Now I'm learning this emerging industry, which is all shot fast and cheap on video, almost entirely direct to video and largely genre-driven, is the third largest film industry in the world. They even have a name for it now--Nollywood. Damn, if I took the Polonia Brothers with me we could be like Dreamworks over there. I seriously would like to write something for that market.

These guys will give you a lot to think about. Especially this part.

Give me a shout at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Zirn Left Unguarded, the Jenjik Palace in Flames, Jon Westerly Dead

I moved my daughter to college, my wife has been sick and also heartbroken, 50 to 75 percent of the people at my day job have been gone with various family dramas and illnesses, the midwest is facing a drought, I owe a lot of people a lot of emails, the great Pacer Reggie Miller may unretire and go play for the Celtics.

But the world is full of small happinesses. I found a 1,000 page omnibus at the library called THE SPACE OPERA RENAISSANCE which I love. I heard "Spinning Wheel" on the radio and thought about days gone by. A friend showed me a baby squirrel he found he is nursing back to health. My wife made homemade ice cream. The world is good.

Give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Sun Comes Up, It's Tuesday Morning

The real world has encroached onto my blogging time quite a bit lately, but I hope to return to regular programming before long. But go check out the site for Microcinema Fest to see what promises to be a really strong lineup of projects from the micro world, once again in beautiful sunny Palatine Illinois. It looks like Amit Tripuraneni's FIVE will be closing out the Fest, the sweet spot where SEX MACHINE sat last year. If you're in the neighborhood come holla at me and my brother there this year!

In the meantime I am punching up a third draft of URAMESHIYA (GHOST SCREAM) for my pal, the aforementioned Amit Tripuraneni, and then seeing what the world brings.

I keep forgetting to tell people that I did this. I called it FRANKENSTEIN THUMB and will be making photocopies by the end of the week if anybody wants one.

I wrote in here recently that the Redbox in front of the McDonald's in the little town ten minutes away is now officially the closest video store to my house. I finally stopped and rented one and it was pretty cool. There was actually a line there, so I'm thinking I'm not the only one who feels the same way. When I walked in my wife narrowed her eyes and said, "You just couldn't stay away from it, could you?"

Give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Grey Flannel Life

It's been one of those hairy days when you look around and almost two weeks have gone by. I hope to return to the blogosphere soon; in the meantime, check out my new blog here.

The yard is a blasted desert, the air God's hair dryer.

I did have a BBQ sandwich dressed with blue cheese chunks that I can't stop thinking about.

I stumbled across ON THE LOT again the other night, after I had sworn it off. I keep forgetting that reality shows aren't real, and I should have remembered that more clearly as ARMED AND FAMOUS came to my hometown not long ago to make a show about law enforcement and mostly used their time there to ridicule the populace.

So much alleged fakery and trickery sprung up around ON THE LOT, this supposed reality search for a new movie director, that many people jumped ship and formed their own website that is currently hosting its own contest. The whole thing makes me a bit tired so google it for yourself if you care to know more.

They are down to six people, two of whom I was suprised to see as they should have been kicked off in the first ten minutes. They are down to one episode a week and the elimination of contestants wasn't even shown live any more. They are wheezing to a conclusion and in the end I just feel sorry for the guys left. Some of them ransomed off their lives to be on this show and it's going to be a sad footnote. I wonder what work, if any, these guys are going to be able to get. I'm sure everybody involved feels a bit sick to the stomach.

Sadly for them, I'm getting more work than these guys. I am getting ready to do a third draft of URAMESHIYA (GHOST SCREAM) for director Amit Tripuraneni. More on this soon.

Give me a shout at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Film Studies

Once upon a time, when I studied film, there was always somebody around who wanted to talk about "Breathless" or "Bicycle Thief" or "The Seventh Seal." I lamented at this blog that not too long ago I went out to dinner with a group of college film studies whose references were "Reservoir Dogs," "Boondock Saints," and the like. And therein lies the rub.

The great world filmmaker Ingmar Bergman died. Though his work can be some pretty tough sledding, might I recommend the archetypal world cinema classic "The Seventh Seal." Young readers might be surprised to learn that no less an august film than "Bill and Ted" paid tribute to this classic (and "The Virgin Spring" became "Last House on the Left," by the by). I am also a fan of "Wild Strawberries" and "Smiles of a Summer Night" (as light as you are going to get, and was adapted into "A Little Night Music"), and many people value "Personae" (as dark as you are going to get, probably).

Check out a nice story from the New York Times here.

We now return to our regularly scheduled b-programming.

MCF

This is me and the great Boston-area filmmaker (and Microcinema Scene founder) Jason Santo chillin' like Bob Dylan in front of the theatre when the fest was in Rapid City, South Dakota a few years ago. Mostly I just posted this to remind everybody that the deadline for entries for this year's fest in Palatine, Illinois is tomorrow. You can check out more at the site here (www.microcinemafest.com), which was just updated today. I was surprised to find this shot in a cache of webphotos Jason had and I didn't think he would mind if I snitched it. Usually when I surf the interwebs googling my name I get to find reviews where people think I suck and wish that I would die. This was a welcome surprise.

My Cleanest Dirty Shirt

My friend Doug showed up Sunday with a grocery sack full o' comics, so I should be happy for a while. It was a nice surpise after a hellacious migraine on Saturday. Although apparently Marvel's "Civil War" is in there, way at the bottom.

My NZ pal Amit Tripuraneni, who I wrote URAMESHIYA (GHOST SCREAM) for, has a pretty interesting interview about his new horror film FIVE right here.

One of these things popped up in front of the McDonald's in the next little town over, making it the closest video store to my house. Has anybody else seen one of these, or tried one?

I don't know where my brother finds stuff like this (probably NSFW).

Give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Back to the B-Mailbag

New reader Michael writes:

I googled your name and your Blog popped up. I couldn't help but notice we have many of the same interests -- screen writing, b-movies, film making, comics, gaming, Kurt Vonnegut, The Catcher in the Rye, etc. After discovering this and the fact you've accomplished many of the same things I want to accomplish, I had to stop myself from prostrating three times at your feet, and asking you to teach me the WAY (or at least be my mentor). But I thought that might be a little unprofessional.

Aim higher! I am still hoping for William Goldman or Michael Tolkin.

I'm looking forward to watching the movies you wrote. I actually purchased two online over the weekend, PETER ROTTENTAIL and RAZORTEETH.

Well, we'll see how much you want to prostrate yourself afterwards!

I watched the SEX MACHINE trailer, and it looks really well done. I see your friends with Bill Cunningham. I've read Bill Cunningham's Blog before and have rented SCARECROW... or maybe it was SCARECROW SLAYER... or both...

Bill is a smart guy with great advice on his blog, especially the part where he told everybody to watch SEX MACHINE.

Thanks for writing, and feel free to give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Smells as Sweet

I don't do a lot of memes on my blog anymore, but sometimes one really strikes my fancy:

1. YOUR SPY NAME (middle name and current street name)
Oak Lone Oak. True!

2.YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME (grandfather/grandmother on your mom's side and your favorite candy):
Vermont York. OK.

3. YOUR RAP NAME (first initial of first name and first three or four letters of your last name):
J-Dalt. Yeah, 'bout right.

4. YOUR GAMER TAG (a favorite color, a favorite animal)
Blue Kitten. Don't understand this one, must be too old.

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (Mom's/Dad's middle name, and city you were born in):
John Muncie. Funny.

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME (first three letters of your last name, last three letters of mother's maiden name, first three letters of your most recent pet's name)
Dalamspan. Good one.

7. JEDI NAME (middle name spelled backwards, your mom's maiden name spelled backwards):
Koa Smillaiw. Even better.

8. PORN STAR NAME (first pet's name, the street you grew up on):
Daisy Colson. Kind of limits the kind of parts I could take, unfortunately.

9. SUPERHERO NAME ("The", the color of shirt you're wearing and the automobile your mom drives):
Orange Olds. Not too inspiring.

10. YOUR ACTION HERO NAME (first name of the main character in the last film you watched, last food you ate):
Jaguar Ribeye. Kinda cool.

Not sure this one worked out the best for me, but there it is. Give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

You Might Say I Was A Musical Proverbial Knee-High

On Friday an old friend invited me over to watch SEX MACHINE at his house, cook out, and have a few beers. My filmography always plays better that way. It was a nice evening and good to see SEX MACHINE through fresh eyes. I don't think I had watched it since it played at Microcinema Fest last summer.

My old pal Pete Bauer weighs in on SEX MACHINE here. Thanks, Pete.

I keep forgetting to post that the final chapter of my article I WAS BIGFOOT'S SHEMP was posted up at Microcinema Scene, here.

I shot off my second draft of URAMESHIYA (GHOST SCREAM) to New Zealand director Amit Tripuraneni on schedule Sunday. His new horror movie, FIVE, is winging its way to the U.S. from the opposite direction as we speak. I'm looking forward to seeing it.

Thinking about doing this now that my stitches are out. I love nerd extreme sports!

Give me a shout at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Frankenstein Thumb: FX Shots

Hell yeah it hurt!

Frankenstein Thumb: FX Shots 2

Once more, with feeling.

Feel Sunshine Sparkle Pink and Blue

I take the bandages off of my thumb tonight, which is good because I need to finish up a few scenes for GHOST SCREAM this weekend. Still hurts a bit to type, though.

In the meantime, somebody found my site by googling boring facts about john dalton and when a squid is frightened, it turns red and Jeremy Mark Bolt needs to quit sticking out his stomach. I can promise the first but I'm not sure about the others.

Are these guys the future?

I love this kind of stuff. And this.

Give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

On the Set of "Frankenstein Thumb"

I had sort of promised myself to stop typing in my blog until I got my stitches out. But last night I had another strange dream about the making of "Frankenstein Thumb."

My hand was throbbing and pulsing like a Bee Gees album and so I gobbled down some Vicodin and crashed out. And though I always thought Vanilla Coke was a good muse, Vicodin might even be better.

In this dream, I was an actor in the movie "Frankenstein Thumb." Something had happened to my thumb--it was implanted with a microchip, or it was a demon thumb, or something--and I was being interrogated by some mysterious people, being played by filmmakers I know from Microcinema Fest. And, curiouser still, I was being interrogated on the stage at Cutting Hall in sunny Palatine, Illinois, where the festival plays.

The fact that these people were mysterious was denoted by the fact that they were all holding flashlights under their chins, giving them Bela Lugosi shadows. I guess now even my muse is used to thinking low-budget.

Any interpretations of this dream are welcome. Until later, give me a shout at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

The Making of "Frankenstein Thumb"

I had this really vivid dream that me and a bunch of filmmakers I have met at Microcinema Fest were making a movie actually at the festival. It may be because I am looking forward to this year's Fest. It also may have been because I was flying along on Vicodin. Which undoubtedly was because I almost peeled my thumbprint off opening a can of tuna for my cats.

I was using a hand can opener and it slipped out of my hands and fell into the kitchen sink. The first thing I said was, "I screwed up," which I knew I had because I didn't feel anything, just a wave of cold. Which was bad because my thumb was spraying blood on the kitchen floor. I looked closer and saw the ball of my thumb canted out away from everything else. So I wrapped a towel around it, but not before my daughter's friend glommed onto the whole thing and vomited. It was a zany few minutes. I had my wife drive me to the emergency room where after spending a few hours reading five-year-old magazines a friendly doctor put nine stitches in my thumb and patched it back together again. Though I suspect I will never be able to commit any left-handed crimes, because I think I am going to have a weird-looking thumbprint; sort of a Colts horseshoe.

The funny thing was that later my daughter and her friend found a piece of broken Cheeto on the kitchen floor and thought it was the tip of my thumb, until she picked it up with a spoon and butter knife and looked closer. I would have given anything to see my daughter creeping up on what she thought was the remains of one of my appendages with a spoon and a butter knife.

So the muse has gone silent here for a bit longer, maybe until I get the stitches out.

The name of the movie we were making? "Frankenstein Thumb." Ah, Vicodin, my fill-in muse.

Give me a yell at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Man Has Cried A Billion Tears

I just sent off a few new scenes to the Polonia Brothers for NEW JOURNEY TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH and am still punching up the third act of URAMESHIYA (GHOST SCREAM) for director Amit Tripuraneni. So let's go to the mailbag for today's entry:

Sporadic reader Joe writes:

Hi, I was watching a movie called Las Vegas Bloodbath, and in the credits, it credits the fx to someone named John Royal Dalton. Any relation?

Some research on IMDB tells me that this is actually David Royal Dalton. No relation. How come nobody wants to know if I'm related to Timothy Dalton?

Loyal reader Dave writes:

Hey, I just signed in to E-mail you. I decided to take a break last night from wrestling (as I usualy watch every night, but the Benoit thing has me reeling) and finaly got to watch Sex Machine. I dug it, you were right, my kind of movie. My only cretique of it has to do with the lack of a budget they had. I assume the budget =the bad ADR which was pretty distracting in some scenes, but other then that I enjoyed the hell out of it.

Thanks, Dave! Good luck with your wrestling career!

New reader Don writes:

During my hitch down in Louisiana (late '80s, early '90s), I remember watching a video from the rental store that a friend had rented, and I'm wondering if it isn't the Cannibal Campout listed under Jon McBride's body of work. I remember a chunky kid with an '80s haircut singing along to a song in a van on the way to the woods, and the bad guys pulling the guts out of a living victim while his buddy had to watch--not much else. Memories!

With that description, it could be nothing else but! Jon enjoys singing in his movies--check out "Bigfoot Stole My Six-pack" in AMONG US.

Write me at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

"We Need Weapons"

Another publicity still I shot for the bigfoot movie AMONG US, as Bob Dennis, Hunter Austin, and Jon McBride try to keep the critics at bay.

Bridge Over Troubled Water

This exclusive behind-the-scenes shot shows the incredibly rickety, dangerous bridge that the Polonia Brothers made use of in AMONG US. They made me carry a heavy tripod across this thing, figuring that the writer was probably the most expendable person on site.

More Among Us

Here's another publicity shot from my bigfoot opus AMONG US, with Bob Dennis, Hunter Austin, and Jon McBride. That remote cabin was genuinely terrifying, being overrun with snakes, vermin, and sporadically visited by bears.

Actors Among Us

Hunter Austin and Bob Dennis prep for a scene while John Polonia lugs around a 16mm camera in the background. I think these two are super-talented and have a special place in my heart because they were the first actors I heard read some of my words aloud. Unfortunately those first sentences included the word "cornhole."