Timon of Athens Pt. 9

In Shakespeare's TIMON OF ATHENS, Timon's surly skater friend Apemantus tries to reason with the bitter and homeless Timon. Strong words ensue.

EXT. CITY PARK -- CONTINUOUS
We see a lot of protesters carrying on some kind of demonstration. Through gaps in the crowd, we see Apemantus in the background, watching the action. His cell phone RINGS. He fishes in his pockets and brings it to his ear. He listens.

EXT. WOODS -- LATER
We see Apemantus moving through the trees, searching. Then he stops and watches Timon digging for roots.

TIMON
Whose womb unmeasurable, and infinite breast, teems, and feeds all; whose self-same mettle, whereof thy proud child, arrogant man, is puffed, engenders the black toad and adder blue, the gilded newt and eyeless venomed worm, with all the abhorred births below crisp heaven whereon Hyperion's quickening fire doth shine; yield him, who all thy human sons doth hate, from forth thy plenteous bosom, one poor root!

He feels Apemantus' eyes upon him.

TIMON (CONT'D)
(to himself)
More man? Plague, plague!

Apemantus steps into sight.

APEMANTUS
I was directed hither; men report thou dost affect my manners, and dost use them.

TIMON
'Tis, then, because thou dost not keep a dog, whom I would imitate; consumption catch thee!

APEMANTUS
This is in thee a nature but infected; a poor unmanly melancholy sprung from change of fortune. Why this spade? This place? This slave-like habit? And these looks of care? Thy flatterers yet wear silk, drink wine, lie soft; hug their diseased perfumes, and have forgot that ever Timon was.

Timon just shakes his head, angrily.

APEMANTUS (CONT'D)
Shame not these woods, by putting on the cunning of a carper. Be thou a flatterer now, and seek to thrive by that which has undone thee. Hinge thy knee, and let his very breath, who thou'lt observe, blow off thy cap; praise his most vicious strain, and call it excellent. Thou was told thus; thou gavest thine ears like tapsters that bid welcome to knaves and all approachers; 'tis most just that thou turn rascal; hadst thou wealth again, rascals should have it. Do not assume my likeness.

TIMON
Were I like thee, I'd throw away myself.

APEMANTUS
Thou hast cast away thyself, being like thyself. A madman so long, now a fool. What, think'st that the bleak air, thy boisterous chamberlain, will put thy shirt on warm? Will these moss'd trees, that have outlived the eagle, page thy heels, and skip where thou point'st out? Will the cold brook, candied with ice, caudle thy morning taste, to cure thy o'er-night's surfeit? Call the creatures whose naked natures live in all the spite of wreakful heaven, whose bare unhoused trunks, to the conflicting elements exposed, answer mere nature; bid them flatter thee. O, thou shalt find--

TIMON
(interrupts)
A fool of thee. Depart.

Apemantus looks regretful.

APEMANTUS
(softly)
I love thee better now than e'er I did.

TIMON
I hate thee worse! Why dost thou seek me out?

Apemantus looks angry.

APEMANTUS
To vex thee!

TIMON
Always a villain's office, or a fool's. Dost please thyself in't?

APEMANTUS
Aye.

TIMON
What! A knave too?

APEMANTUS
If thou didst put this sour-cold habit on to castigate thy pride, 'twere well; but thou does it enforcedly. Thou'ldst courtier be again, wert thou not beggar.

Timon points, hand shaking.

TIMON
Thou art a slave, whom Fortune's tender arm with favor never clasped; but bred a dog. Why shouldst thou hate men? They never flattered thee. What has thou given? If thou wilt curse, thy father, that poor rag, must be thy subject, who in spite put stuff to some she-beggar and compounded thee poor rogue hereditary. Hence, be gone! If thou hadst not been born the worst of men, thou hadst been a knave and a flatterer.

Apemantus takes this, looking at the ground. Then he looks up.

APEMANTUS
Art thou proud yet?

TIMON
Aye, that I am not thee. Were all the wealth I have shut up in thee, I'd give thee leave to hang it. Get thee gone. That the whole life of Athens were in this! Thus would I eat it.

Timon grimly munches on a root. Apemantus reaches up and snaps off a branch, then holds it out.

APEMANTUS
Here, I will mend thy feast.

TIMON
First mend my company, take away thyself.

APEMANTUS
So I shall mend mine own, by the lack of thine.

TIMON
'Tis not well mended so, it is but botched; if not, I would it were.

Apemantus throws the branch down and looks at Timon carefully.
APEMANTUS
What wouldst thou have to Athens?

TIMON
Thee thither in a whirlwind. If thou wilt, tell them there I have gold. Look, so I have.

Apemantus follows his jutting thumb to the dirty trash bag Timon has been dragging. Apemantus slowly goes over and peers inside, registers its contents.

APEMANTUS
Here is no use for gold.

TIMON
The best and truest; for here it sleeps, and does no hired harm.

Apemantus looks around.

APEMANTUS
Where liest of nights, Timon?

TIMON
Under that's above me. Where feed'st thou o' the days, Apemantus?

APEMANTUS
Where my stomach finds meat; or, rather, where I eat it.

TIMON
Would poison were obedient and knew my mind!

APEMANTUS
Why wouldst thou send it?

TIMON
To sauce thy dishes.

Again Apemantus looks sadly at his friend.

APEMANTUS
The middle of humanity thou never knewest, but the extremity of both ends. When thou wast in thy gilt and thy perfume, they mocked thee for too much curiosity. In thy rags thou knowest none, but art despised for the contrary.

Timon stares off into the trees.

TIMON
What wouldst thou do with the world, Apemantus, if it lay in thy power?

APEMANTUS
(softly)
Give it to the beasts, to be rid of the men.

TIMON
Wouldst thou have thyself fall in the confusion of men, and remain a beast with the beasts?

APEMANTUS
Aye, Timon.

TIMON
(mocking)
A beastly ambition, which the gods grant thee to attain to! If thou wert the lion, the fox would beguile thee; if thou wert the lamb, the fox would eat thee; if thou wert the fox, the lion would suspect thee, when peradventure thou wert accused by the ass; if thou wert the ass, thy dullness would torment thee, and still thou livedst but as a breakfast to the wolf; if thou wert the wolf, thy greediness would afflict thee, and oft thou shouldst hazard thy life for thy dinner. Wert thou the unicorn, pride and wrath would confound thee and make thine own self the conquest of thy fury; wert thou a bear, thou wouldst be killed by the horse; wert thou a horse, thou wouldst be seized by the leopard; wert thou a leopard, thou wert german to the lion and the spots of thy kindred were jurors on thy life; all safety were remotion and thy defense absence. What beast couldst thou be, that were not subject to a beast? And what a beast art thou already, that seest not thy loss in transformation?

APEMANTUS
If thou couldst please me with speaking to me, thou mightst have hit upon it here; the commonwealth of Athens is become a forest of beasts.

TIMON
(with mock surprise)
How has the ass broke the wall, that thou art out of the city?

Apemantus sizes him up.

APEMANTUS
When I know not what else to do, I'll see thee again.

TIMON
When there is nothing living but thee, thou shalt be welcome. I had rather be a beggar's dog than Apemantus.

Apemantus gets really mad now, and the two begin circling and pushing.

APEMANTUS
Thou art the cap of all the fools alive!

TIMON
Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon!

APEMANTUS
A plague on thee! Thou art too bad to curse.

TIMON
All villains that do stand by thee are pure.

APEMANTUS
There is no leprosy but what thou speak'st.

TIMON
If I name thee, I'll beat thee, but I should infect my hands!

Apemantus shoves him harder.

APEMANTUS
I would my tongue could rot them off!

Timon pushes back.

TIMON
Away, thou issue of a mangy dog! Choler does kill me that thou art alive; I swound to see thee.

APEMANTUS
Would thou wouldst burst!

TIMON
Away, thy tedious rogue! I am sorry I shall lose a stone by thee!

Timon hefts a rock and flings it at Apemantus, who ducks out of the way.

APEMANTUS
Beast!

TIMON
Slave!

APEMANTUS
Toad!

TIMON
Rogue, rogue, rogue! I am sick of this false world, and will love nought but even the mere necessities upon it. Then, Timon, presently prepare thy grave; lie where the light foam from the sea may beat thy gravestone daily. Make thine epitaph, that death in me at others' lives may laugh!

APEMANTUS
Would 'twere so! Live, and love thy misery!

TIMON
Long live so, and so die!

Apemantus throws his hands up and retreats backward, staring at Timon the whole time. Before he disappears from sight, he takes the old photo of he and Timon out of his deep sagging pocket; and spears it on a limb.
Timon sees it impaled there as Apemantus exits.


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Timon of Athens Part VIII

In this segment of TIMON OF ATHENS, Timon, now a hermit, has a chance meeting with corporate lawyer Alcibiades, and ends up helping him with his hostile takeover of Athens OS.

EXT. COUNTRY ROADS -- DAY
CG: ONE MONTH LATER
We see a big, sleek sedan humming down the road.

INT. ALCIBIADES' CAR -- MOMENTS LATER
Alcibiades is listening on his cell phone with it cupped between his jaw and shoulder, while scrolling down on a laptop with one hand and holding Timandra's hand with the other. She is bored, looking out the window. PHRYNIA, a sharp, all-business woman with slicked-back hair and a square-cut suit, is behind the wheel.
Suddenly there is a BUMP and the SLAP of rubber. Phrynia keeps control of the vehicle and carefully steers it to the side of the road as Alcibiades and Timandra look on with surprise and some disappointment.

EXT. WOODS -- MOMENTS LATER
We see Alcibiades and Timandra, in varying stages of impatience, watching Phrynia change a tire.
There is a flash of movement in the trees that catches Alcibiades' eye. More movement, a swatch of color; all three note it.
Something scratches at the back of Alcibiades' mind; something familiar. He moves forward, with Timandra and Phrynia falling in behind.
They thread their way through the trees, Alcibiades determined, the others more hesitant.
We see Timon ahead, looking dirty and ragged. He is pulling a large trash bag, has a rusty ax knotted in a rope around his waist, has slung a broken-handled shovel over one stooped shoulder. His t-shirt and boxers are grime-encrusted. He drops to his knees.

TIMON
O blessed breeding sun, draw from the earth rotten humidity; below thy sister's orb infect the air! Destruction fang mankind! Earth, yield me roots.

We see Timon rooting around in the earth with shovel and blade.

TIMON (CONT'D)
Come, damned earth, thou common whore of mankind, that put'st odds among the route of nations, I will make thee do thy right nature.

Alcibiades tentatively comes into the clearing where Timon crouches.

ALCIBIADES
What art thou there? Speak.

Timon turns away.

TIMON
A beast, as thou art. The canker gnaw thy heart, for showing me again the eyes of man!

ALCIBIADES
What is thy name? Is man so hateful to thee, that art thyself a man?

TIMON
I am Misanthropos, and hate mankind. For thy part, I do wish thou art a dog, that I might love thee something.

Alcibiades looks more closely. Phrynia tries to shield Alcibiades a bit.

ALCIBIADES
I know thee well; but in thy fortunes am unlearned and strange.

TIMON
I know thee too; and more than that I know thee, I not desire to know. Follow thy drum; with man's blood paint the ground.
(points to Phrynia)
This fell whore of thine hath in her more destruction than thy sword, for all her cherubim look.

Phrynia looks on coldly.

PHRYNIA
Thy lips rot off!

TIMON
I will not kiss thee; then the rot returns to thine own lips again.

Alcibiades counsels Phrynia to calm down with a gesture, then turns on Timon, fascinated.

ALCIBIADES
How come the noble Timon to this change?

TIMON
As the moon does, by wanting light to give; but then renew I could not, like the moon. There were no suns to borrow of.

Alcibiades is stunned.

ALCIBIADES
Noble Timon, what friendship may I do thee?

Timon pretends to think.

TIMON
Promise me friendship, but perform none. If thou wilt promise, the gods plague thee, for thou art a man! If thou dots perform, confound thee, for thou art a man!

ALCIBIADES
I have heard in some sort of thy miseries.

TIMON
Thou saw'st them, when I had prosperity.

ALCIBIADES
I see them now; then was a blessed time.

TIMON
As thine is now, held with a brace of harlots.

Timandra looks Timon up and down, then looks at Alcibiades, a light dawning.

TIMANDRA
Is this the Athenian minion, whom the world voiced so regardfully?

TIMON
Art thou Timandra?

TIMANDRA
Yes.

TIMON
Be a whore still; they love thee not that use thee; give them diseases, leaving them with thee their lust.

Timandra looks repulsed.

TIMANDRA
Hang thee, monster!

Alcibiades touches his girlfriend's shoulder.
ALCIBIADES

Pardon him, sweet Timandra; for his wits are drowned and lost in his calamities.
(to Timon)
I have but little gold of late, brave Timon, the want whereof doth daily make revolt in my penurious band. I have heard, and grieved, how cursed Athens, mindless of thy worth, forgetting thy great deeds, when neighbor states, but for thy sword and fortune, trod upon them--

TIMON
I prithee, beat thy drum, and get thee gone.

ALCIBIADES
I am thy friend, and pity thee, dear Timon.

TIMON
How dost thou pity him whom thou ­dost trouble? I had rather be alone.
Alcibiades looks him over again, then SIGHS. He fishes in an inner pocket and produces a fat wallet.

ALCIBIADES
Why, fare thee well. Here is some gold for thee.

Timon dismisses him.

TIMON
Keep it, I cannot eat it.

Alcibiades shakes his head, looking grim, and puts his wallet away.

ALCIBIADES
When I have laid proud Athens on a heap--

Timon perks up.

TIMON
Warr'st thou against Athens?

ALCIBIADES
(nodding at Timon's state)
Ay, Timon, and have cause.

TIMON
The gods confound them all in thy conquest; and thee after, when thou ­hast conquered!

ALCIBIADES
Why me, Timon?

TIMON
That, by killing of villains, thou was born to conquer my country.

Timon starts to root around in his dirty trash bag, and surprisingly comes out with two fistfuls of cash.
He starts pushing wads of money at a shocked Alcibiades.

TIMON (CONT'D)
Put up thy gold. Go on--here's gold--go on. Be as a planetary plague, when Jove will over some high-viced city hang his poison in the sick air. Let not thy sword skip one. Pity not honored age for his white beard; he is an usurer. Strike me the counterfeit matron; it is her habit only that is honest, herself's a bawd. Let not the virgin's cheek make soft thy trenchant sword; for those milk-paps, that through the window-bars bore at men's eyes, are not within the leaf of pity writ, but set them down horrible traitors. Spare not the babe, whose dimpled smiles from fools exhaust their mercy; think it a bastard, whom the oracle hath doubtfully pronounced thy throat shall cut, and mince it sans remorse. Swear against object, put armor on thine ears and on thine eyes, whose proof, nor yells of mothers, maids, nor babes, nor sight of priests in holy vestments bleeding, shall pierce a jot. There's gold to pay soldiers; make large confusion; and, thy fury spent, confounded be thyself! Speak not, be gone.

Alcibiades looks surprised, then looks resolved, his eyes cunning.

ALCIBIADES
Hast thou gold yet? I'll take the gold thou givest me, not all thy counsel.

Timon grabs out another few handfuls and shoves it at Alcibiades. Timandra looks on with interest.

TIMANDRA
More counsel with more money, bounteous Timon.

TIMON
More whore, more mischief first; I have given you earnest.

Alcibiades touches her elbow, and looks at Phrynia.

ALCIBIADES
Strike up the drums towards Athens!
(to Timon)
Farewell, Timon; If I thrive well, I'll visit thee again.

TIMON
If I hope well, I'll never see thee more.

Alcibiades looks distraught.

ALCIBIADES
I never did thee harm.

TIMON
Yes, thy spokest well of me.

ALCIBIADES
Call'st thou that harm?

TIMON
Men daily find it. Get thee away, and take thy beagles with thee.

ALCIBIADES
(to the others)
We but offend him. Strike!

They move away, Timon glaring in their wake.

EXT. COUNTRY ROADS -- MOMENTS LATER
Phrynia pulls the car off of the shoulder and back onto the road.

INT. ALCIBIADES' CAR -- CONTINUOUS
In the roomy back seat, we see Alcibiades musing. He fishes out a PDA, and thumbs through it. Finding what he is looking for, he dials a number on his cell.


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Timon of Athens Part VII

The dotcom bubble bursts in this installment of TIMON OF ATHENS. It was actually very common for the actor playing Timon to strip to his skivvies, as depicted here, during his return to nature.

EXT. STREETS -- LATER
We see Timon's sportscar tearing through the streets.

INT. TIMON'S CAR -- CONTINUOUS
He tilts the rearview mirror so that he can see the skyline retreating behind him.

TIMON
Let me look back upon thee. O thou wall, that girdlest in those wolves, dire of the earth, and fence not Athens!

EXT. COUNTRY ROADS -- LATER
Timon is leaving the city behind. Gradually we see his car slow, then pull over to the shoulder and stop.
Timon gets out, dejected, loosening his tie. He flings it off into the bush.
He hits the unlock button on his keys, and his trunk springs open.
From his POV, we see changes of clothes, his laptop, a tennis racquet, all the detritus of a full high-powered life.
He starts stripping down and throwing his dress clothes into the trunk, eventually leaving a t-shirt and boxers.

TIMON
Plagues, incident to men, your potent and infectious fevers heap on Athens, ripe for stroke! Thou cold sciatica, cripple our senators, that their limbs may halt as lamely as their manners. Lust and liberty creep in the minds and marrows of our youth, that 'gainst the stream of virtue they may strive, and drown themselves in riot! Itches, blains, sow all the Athenian bosoms; and their crop be general leprosy! Breath infect breath, at their society, as their friendship, may merely poison! Nothing I'll bear from thee, but nakedness, thou detestable town! Take thou that too, with multiplying bans! Timon will to the woods; where he shall find the unkindest beast more kinder than mankind. The gods confound--hear me, you good gods all--the Athenians both within and out that wall! And grant, as Timon grows, his hate may grow to the whole race of mankind, high and low!
(beat, bitterly)
Amen.

We see Timon striding away, into a red sunset.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (ANTEROOM) -- DAY
We SMASH CUT to a full-screen CG with a techno news backbeat under it. The screen reads: CEO FIRED, MISSING and features a photo of Timon. Then the image WIPES to a photo of Alcibiades, looking serious, and the CG: HOSTILE TAKEOVER?
The graphic pushes into a box over the shoulder of Philotus, who is getting ready to give a report.
But the screen goes to BLACK, abruptly.
We CUT WIDE and see that Flavia has unplugged the little TV on her desk. She is packing up her stuff in a cardboard box.
Servilius and Flaminius poke their heads in. Each of them is carrying a load of their junk.

SERVILIUS
Hear you, master steward, where's our master? Are we undone? Cast off? Nothing remaining?

FLAVIA
Alack, my fellows, what should I say to you? Let me be recorded by the righteous gods, I am as poor as you.

SERVILIUS
Such a house broke!

Flavia grabs her box and joins them.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (HALLWAY) -- CONTINUOUS
Flavia, Servilius, and Flaminius walk down a desolate hall. Some files have spilled out into the hall, and many monitors are dark.

FLAMINIUS
All broken implements of a ruined house.

SERVILIUS
Yet do our hearts wear Timon's livery, that I see by our faces. We are fellows still, serving alike in sorrow. Leak'd is our bark, and we, poor mates, stand on the dying deck.
Flavia stops.

FLAVIA
Good fellows all, the latest of my wealth I'll share among you. Wherever we shall meet, for Timon's sake, let's yet be fellows. Let's shake our heads, and say, as 'twere a knell unto our master's fortunes, 'We have seen better days.'

Flavia roots in her purse. The others protest.

FLAVIA (CONT'D)
Let each take some. Nay, put our your hands. Not one word more; thus part we rich in sorrow, parting poor.

She gives them both a few bills. They clasp hands, embrace, part ways.

EXT. TIMON'S OFFICE BUILDING -- CONTINUOUS
Flavia exits the building and puts her belongings in the little basket. She starts to unlock her bike, and looks back up at the building.

FLAVIA
O, the fierce wretchedness that glory brings us! Who would not wish to be from wealth exempt, since riches point to misery and contempt? Who would be so mocked in glory? Or to live in but a dream of friendship? To have his pomp and all what state compounds but only painted, like his varnished friends? Poor honest lord, brought low by his own heart, undone by goodness. Strange, unusual blood, when man's worst sin is, he does too much good! Who, then, dares to be half so kind again? For bounty, that makes gods, does still mar men. My dearest lord, blessed, to be most accursed, rich, only to be wretched, thy great fortunes are made thy chief afflictions. Alas, kind lord! He's flung in rage from this ungrateful seat of monstrous friends, nor has he with him to supply his life, or that which can command it. I'll follow and inquire him out. I'll ever serve his mind with my best will; whilst I have gold, I'll be his steward still.

Resolved, Flavia cycles away.


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Timon of Athens Pt. 6

In this installment of my modern dress, original prose version of Shakespeare's TIMON OF ATHENS, a down-and-out Timon finally busts a proverbial cap in the asses of his false friends.



EXT. TIMON'S HOUSE -- EVENING
A pretty sunset behind Timon's house. We see guests arriving.
A more vociferous clot of reporters are hustling around the perimeter. Lucullus goes by with his coat over his face, but others, like Ventidius, are being interviewed.
We see Lucius running the gauntlet and taking it all in.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) -- MOMENTS LATER
Lucius strolls in and spots Sempronius.


SEMPRONIUS
The good time of day to you, sir.


LUCIUS
I also wish it to you. I think this honorable lord did but try us this other day.
Sempronius looks around, then leans in conspiratorally.


SEMPRONIUS
Upon that were my thoughts tiring, when we encountered. I hope it is not so low with him as he made it seem in the trial of his several friends.


LUCIUS
It should not be, by the persuasion of his new feasting.


SEMPRONIUS
(airily)
I should think so. He hath sent me an earnest inviting, which many my near occasions did urge me to put off. But he hath conjured me beyond them, and I must needs appear.


LUCIUS
In like manner was I in debt to my importunate business, but he would not hear my excuse. I am sorry, when he sent to borrow of me, that my provision was out.


SEMPRONIUS
(oily)
I am sick of that grief too, as I understand how all things go.


LUCIUS
Every man here's so.


Timon appears at the door to the dining room, beaming.


TIMON
With all my heart, gentlemen both; and how fare you?


LUCIUS
Ever at the best, hearing well of your lordship.


SEMPRONIUS
The swallow follows not summer more willing than we follow your lordship.


Timon looks like he's ready to say something, but instead ushers them in.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (DINING ROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
Lucius and Sempronius soon meet Lucullus, Ventidius, and others, coming in on their heels. All are met as hearty fellows.
Sempronius claps eyes on the elaborate silver-domed dishes at every place, and touches Timon's arm, a greasy smile on his face.


SEMPRONIUS
I hope it remains not unkindly with your lordship that I returned you an empty messenger.


TIMON
O, sir, let it not trouble you.


Lucius looks a little embarrassed.


LUCIUS
My lord--


TIMON
Ah, my good friend, what cheer?


LUCIUS
My most honorable lord, I am even sick of shame, that, when your lordship this other day sent to me, I was unfortunate a beggar.


TIMON
Think not on it, sir.


LUCIUS
Had you been but two hours before--


TIMON
Let it not cumber your better remembrance.


Timon takes his place at the head of the table.


TIMON (CONT'D)
Come, bring in all together!


Everyone gets a good look at the silver-covered dish waiting at every chair.


SEMPRONIUS
All covered dishes!


He eagerly takes his seat.


Lucius slips into the chair next to Ventidius.


LUCIUS
Royal cheer, I warrant you.


VENTIDIUS
Doubt not that, if money and the season can yield it.


Sempronius leans over, in an exagerrated pose of confidentiality.


SEMPRONIUS
How do you? What's the news?


VENTIDIUS
Alcibiades is banished; hear you of it?


SEMPRONIUS
(eyes round)
Alcibiades banished!


VENTIDIUS
'Tis so, be sure of it.


LUCIUS
How? How?


SEMPRONIUS
I pray you, upon what?


Timon looks narrowly down the table, but then smiles again.


TIMON
My friends, will you draw near?


VENTIDIUS
(quietly)
I'll tell you more anon. Here's a noble feast toward.


Timon stands.


TIMON
Each man to his stool, with that spur as he would to the lip of his mistress; your diet shall be in all places alike.
(beat)
The gods require our thanks.


Everyone bows their heads.


TIMON (CONT'D)
You great benefactors, sprinkle our society with thankfulness. For your own gifts, make yourselves be praised; but reserve still to give, lest your deities be despised. Lend to each man enough, that one need not lend to another; for, were your godheads to borrow of men, men would forsake the gods. Make the meat be beloved more than the man that gives it. Let no assembly of twenty be without a score of villains. If there sit twelve women at the table, let a dozen of them be--as they are. The rest of your feed, O gods--the senators of Athens, together with the common lag of people--what is amiss in them, you gods, make suitable for destruction. For these my present friends, as they are to me nothing, so in nothing bless them, and to nothing they are welcome.


Everyone has dropped their jovial masks, begun looking sicker, and more scared and uncomfortable, as Timon builds a head of steam. He looks around the table, eyes gleaming, teeth bared.


TIMON (CONT'D)
Uncover, dogs, and lap.


Slowly, carefully, everyone reveals their covered plates.
From various POVs we see bowls filled with water, and a stone in the center of each one.
Sempronius' jaw swings open.


SEMPRONIUS
What does his lordship mean?


LUCULLUS
I know not.


Timon's cold fury is turned on them.


TIMON
May you a better feast never behold, you knot of mouth-friends! Smoke and lukewarm water is your perfection! This is Timon's last; who, stuck and spangled with your flatteries, washes it off, and sprinkles in your faces your reeking villainy!
Timon overturns bowls and splashes his guests. They begin to jump from their seats, stunned.
Live loathed and long, most smiling, smooth, detested parasites, courteous destroyers, affable wolves, meek bears...you fools of fortune, trencher-friends, time's flies, cap and knee slaves, vapors, and minute-jacks! Of man and beast the infinite malady crust you quite over!


Sempronius SHRIEKS in terror. Everyone heads for the doors, as Timon begins to throw rocks, bowls, plates, utensils, everything.


TIMON
What, dost thou go? Soft! Take thy physic first--thou too--and thou--stay, I will lend thee money, borrow none!


Timon pursues them.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
Everyone is scattering under Timon's assault.


TIMON
What, all in motion? Henceforth be no feast, where at a villain's not a welcome guest!


Timon is alone. He raises his fists and closes his eyes.


TIMON (CONT'D)
Burn, home! Sink, Athens! Henceforth hated be of Timon man and all humanity!
He drops to his knees, consumed with his rage.

EXT. TIMON'S HOUSE -- CONTINUOUS
A handful of shocked guests remain, stumbling around.


LUCIUS
How now, my lords!


SEMPRONIUS
(sniffling)
Know you the quality of Timon's fury?


VENTIDIUS
Push!
(beat)
Did you see my cap?


LUCULLUS
I have lost my gown.


SEMPRONIUS
He's but a mad lord, and nought but humor sways him. He gave me a jewel the other day, and now he has beat it out of my hat.
(beat)
Did you see my jewel?


LUCULLUS
Here lies my gown.


LUCIUS
Let's make no stay.


SEMPRONIUS
Lord Timon's mad!


VENTIDIUS
I feel it upon my bones.


LUCULLUS
One day he gives us diamonds, next day stones.


Suddenly Timon's car comes ROARING past. They all watch it peel out, and he is gone.



This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Timon of Athens Pt. 5

This is some of my favorite work in my modern dress original prose version of Shakespeare's TIMON OF ATHENS. First I took a big chunk of Greek Chorus exposition and made it into a television piece to give it a little oomph (plus using the b-movie trick of getting a lot of little cameos without the rest of the cast around); then you see corporate lawyer Alcibiades, who was a general in the original version, and his fight with the Board of Directors. I thought his argument with the Board of Directors (the Athens town fathers in the original), and his threat to return in battle, was perfect for the corporate takeover scenario seen further on, as the attitudes are, curiously, the same, methinks.


INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (INNER SANCTUM) -- CONTINUOUS
Timon looks out the window, gravely.
From his POV, we see the cameras massing outside, already interviewing Caphis, Titus, and Hortensius.

TIMON
What, are my doors opposed against my passage? Have I been ever free, and must my house be my retentive enemy, my gaol? The place which I have feasted, does it now, like all mankind, show me an iron heart?

Timon strides across the room and turns on the large plasma screen he has mounted there.
Instantly, he sees a graphic reading "ATHENS-OS" and showing the jagged downward line on a graph that indicates a plummeting stock. Timon looks stunned.

TIMON (CONT'D)
Cleave me to the girdle.

Next, he sees LACHES in his office. CG: Laches, Bank of Lacedaemon

LACHES
(on TV)
Mine, fifty talents.

TIMON
Cut my heart in sums.

Next we see another man in his office, THRASYCLES. CG: Thrasycles, Samos Venture Capitalist Group

THRASYCLES
(on TV)
Five thousand crowns, my lord.

TIMON
Five thousand drops pays that!

Now we see Caphis, in front of the building. CG: Caphis, Assistant to the Board of Directors, Athens-OS

CAPHIS
(on TV)
Faith, I perceive our masters may throw their caps at their money. Those debts may well be called desperate ones, for a madman owes 'em.

Timon watches, steely-eyed.

TIMON
Tear me, take me; let the gods fall upon you!

Flavia appears at his shoulder, tentatively. He notices her there, then turns back to the TV.

TIMON (CONT'D)
They have even put my breath from me, the slaves. Creditors? Devils!

FLAVIA
My dear lord--

TIMON
What if it should be so?

FLAVIA
My lord--

TIMON
I'll have it so.

He turns back to Flavia.

TIMON (CONT'D)
Go, bid all my friends again, Lucius, Lucullus, and Sempronius; all, sirrah, all. I'll once more feast the rascals.

Flavia looks shocked.

FLAVIA
O my lord, you only speak from your distracted soul. There is not so much left, to furnish out a moderate table.

TIMON
Be it not in thy care. Go, I charge thee, invite them all. Let the tide of knaves once more, my cook and I'll provide.

He turns his attention back to the TV as Flavia tries to take this news in.

EXT. STREETS -- CONTINUOUS
We see the TV images full-screen, a series of interviews. First is PHILIADES.

PHILIADES
Who, the Lord Timon? He is my very good friend, and an honorable gentleman.

Next we see HOSTILIUS.

HOSTILIUS
We know him for no less, though we are but strangers to him. But I can tell you one thing. My lord, and which I hear from common rumors, now Lord Timon's happy hours are done and past, and his estate shrinks from him.

Next, Alcibiades, pushing cameras away. CG: Alcibiades, CFO, Athens-OS

ALCIBIADES
Fie, no, do not believe it; he cannot want for money.

Next we see TISAPHERNES, walking down the sidewalk.

TISAPHERNES
But believe you this, my lord, that, not long ago, one of his men was with the Lord Lucullus to borrow so many talents, nay, urged extremely for it and showed what necessity belonged to it, and yet was denied.

PHILOTUS (O.S.)
How?

TISAPHERNES
I tell you, denied, my lord.

Then Tisaphernes picks up the pace and is gone.

We see Servilius, in front of his own apartment building. CG: Servilius, HelpDesk Support, Athens-OS

SERVILIUS
What a strange case was that! Now, before the gods, I am ashamed on it. Denied that honorable man! There was very little honor showed in it.

Next is Demeas, at a podium, making an official press statement. CG: Demeas, Legal Counsel, Athens-OS

DEMEAS
I wonder on it; he was wont to shine at seven.

Next we see PHILOTUS, a serious but perfectly coifed reporter, doing a stand-up in the busy streets. CG: Philotus, First Folio News

PHILOTUS
Ay, but the days are waxed shorter with him. You must consider that a prodigal course is like the sun's. But not, like his, recoverable. I fear 'tis deepest winter in Lord Timon's purse; that one may reach deep enough, and yet find little.

We see the screen dip to BLACK, as if the TV was shut off.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (BOARDROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
Alcibiades steps away from turning off the television that the somber boardroom is watching. We see Varro, Isidore, Demeas, and other angry or worried faces looking back at Alcibiades, with assistants like Caphis, Hortensius, and Titus lurking in the background. This is the board of directors of Athens-OS, and they have seen better days.

VARRO
My lord, you have my voice to it; The fault's bloody; 'tis necessary he should die. Nothing emboldens sin so much as mercy.

DEMEAS
Most true; the law shall bruise him.

ALCIBIADES
I am a humble suitor to your virtues; for pity is the virtue of the law, and none but tyrants use it cruelly. It pleases time and fortune to lie heavy upon a friend of mine, who, in hot blood, hath stepped into the law, which is past depth to those that, without heed, do plunge into it.

VARRO
You undergo too strict a paradox, striving to make an ugly deed look fair. He's truly valiant that can wisely suffer the worst that man can breathe, and make his wrongs his outsides, to wear them like his rainment, carelessly, and never prefer his injuries to heart, to bring it into danger.

ALCIBIADES
My lord--

VARRO
You cannot make gross sins look clear.

ALCIBIADES
I say, my lords, he has done fair service, and slain in fight many of your enemies.

DEMEAS
He has made too much plenty with them; he's a sworn rioter. He has a sin that often drowns him, and takes his valor prisoner. His days are foul and his drink dangerous.
Alcibiades can't believe what he's hearing, and grows more angry by the moment.

ALCIBIADES
Hard fate!
(beat, thinks)
My lords, if not for any part of him--though his right arm might purchase his own time and be in debt to none--yet, more to move you, take my deserts to his, and join them both. And, for I know your reverend ages love security, I'll pawn my victories, all honors to you, upon his good returns.

DEMEAS
We are for law; he dies. Urge it no more, on height of our displeasure.

ALCIBIADES
Must it be so? It must not be. My lords, I do beseech you, know me.
Isidore finally leans forward, her fingers steepled.

ISIDORE
How?

ALCIBIADES
Call me to your remembrances.

ISIDORE
What!

She leans back.

ALCIBIADES
I cannot think but your age has forgot me. It could not else be, I should prove so base, to sue, and be denied such common grace. My wounds ache at you.

VARRO
Do you dare our anger? 'Tis in few words, but spacious in effect.
(beat)
We banish thee forever.

Alcibiades SLAMS the table.

ALCIBIADES
Banish me? Banish your dotage, banish usury, that makes the senate ugly.

VARRO
If after two days' shine, Athens contain thee, attend our weightier judgment.

Alcibiades stares around the table, looking each person full in the face. Then he snaps his briefcase shut and, with a curt nod, storms out.

An uncomfortable silence follows, as the board looks at each other.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (HALLWAY) -- MOMENTS LATER
Alcibiades stalks down the hall, his face clouded with fury. We see workers dodging out of his way as Alcibiades suddenly puts foot to handy trash can, shredded documents flying.

ALCIBIADES
(to himself)
Now the gods keep you old enough; that you may live only in bone, that none may look on you! I'm worse than mad; I have kept back their foes, while they have told their money and let out their coin upon large interest, I myself rich only in large hurts. All those for this? Banishment! It comes not ill. I hate not to be banished, it is a cause worthy my spleen and fury, that I may strike at Athens. I'll cheer up my discontented troops, and lay for hearts. 'Tis honor with most lands to be at odds; soldiers should brook as little wrongs as gods.

He walks out of frame.



This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Shake Your Booty!

This morning I was dreaming my wife and I were looking at buying a house and went to the Open House on a dark, snowy night. It was kind of creepy and I heard the bureau rattling. Then I was half awake and hearing a real bureau rattling and thinking my cats had gotten into my underwear drawer again (my wife suspects it's because my drawer smells like a catbox, but I digress). Then I heard a SKWONK! and I thought the siding was coming off the house. I came fully awake when my wife shouted "Earthquake!" and we both ran downstairs and out the front door as the siren in town nearby went off.

At first I wasn't sure what exactly had happened, but yes, we had a damn earthquake. If a tornado comes through town and knocks down the high school or something we don't think much about it here in Indiana. But an earthquake! Dang, man!

In other seismic occurrences, my brother had a birthday this week. I won't tell you which one because I've lobbed enough grendaes at my brother when I was supposed to be his wingman. I'm really out of practice being a wingman, having been married most all of my adult life; the last time I tried to put the moves on a stone fox, Gerry Rafferty was playing on the radio. Suffice to say he is young at heart. We celebrated by going out for Thai and then playing the "War on Terror" board game with a pal.

"War on Terror" is sort of like a mix between "Risk" and "Settlers of Cataan" with the backroom dealings of "Monopoly" thrown in. I believe you could actually be sent to Guantanamo Bay for even owning this game. Basically you build an empire while deciding whether you secretly want to fund terrorism to take down the other empires that are competing with you. However, if you start seeding terrorists all over the place, they can turn on you and be used by other players as well.

Both times we played terrorism won. The first time rather abruptly when a terrorist hijacking bankrupted an empire when an attempt to foil it went wrong, allowing too much of the world to fall into anarchy (and thus the terrorists won). The second time rather slowly, as a player willingly became a terrorist after I nuked the U.S. and Europe (only a little) from my South American empire because the U.S. kept trying to destabilize me. I thought I had launched an endgame to solidify my empire but actually ended up causing worldwide chaos and had to give in to terrorism in the end. I left being glad than neither my brother or my friend are running for public office.

Waiting for aftershocks at johnoakdalton@hotmail.com.

Timon of Athens, Pt. 4

In this installment of Shakespeare's TIMON OF ATHENS, Timon's most trusted helpdesk employees go out to try and rustle up some money to get Timon's dotcom out of hot water, to no avail. I used one of my favorite exchanges from TITUS ANDRONICUS for the soap opera that Lucullus is watching on TV.

EXT. LUCULLUS' APARTMENT BUILDING -- LATER
Servilius looks up at the building, and checks the box tucked under his arm.

INT. LUCULLUS' APARTMENT -- MOMENTS LATER
Lucullus is working out and watching soaps on TV.

DEMETRIUS
(on TV)
Villain, what hast thou done?

AARON
(on TV)
That which thou canst not undo.

DEMETRIUS
(on TV)
Thou hast undone our mother.

AARON
(on TV)
Villain, I have done thy mother.

The doorbell rings, and Lucullus reluctantly tears himself away.
He opens it to see Servilius studying him.

LUCULLUS
One of Lord Timon's men? A gift, I warrant. Why, this hits right. I dreamt of a silver basin and ewer tonight. Servilius, honest Servilius; you are very respectively welcome, sir.

Servilius comes in and takes a cool look around.

LUCULLUS (CONT'D)
And how does that honorable, complete, free-hearted gentleman of Athens, thy very bountiful good lord and master?

SERVILIUS
His health is well, sir.

LUCULLUS
I am right glad that his health is well, sir. And what hast thou there under thy cloak?

SERVILIUS
Faith, nothing but an empty box, sir. Which, in my lord's behalf, I come to entreat your honor to supply; who, having great and instant occasion to use fifty talents, hath sent to your lordship to furnish him, nothing doubting your present assistance therein.

Lucullus goes to fetch a pair of beers from the fridge. His face shows the strain of his mind calculating.

LUCULLUS
'Nothing doubting,' says he? Alas, good lord! A noble gentleman 'tis, if he would not keep so good a house. Many a time and often I have dined with him, and told him on it, and come again to supper to him, of purpose to have him spend less, and yet he would embrace no counsel, take no warning by my coming. Every man has his fault, and honesty is his.

He hands a bottle to Servilius.

LUCULLUS (CONT'D)
I have noted thee always wise. Here's to thee.

Servilius just sits the bottle down.

SERVILIUS
Your lordship speaks your pleasure.

Lucullus takes a long pull.

LUCULLUS
Draw nearer, honest Servilius. Thy lord's a bountiful gentleman. But thou art wise, and thou knowest well enough, although thou comest to me, that this is no time to lend money, especially upon bare friendship, without security.

Lucullus pulls out his wallet, and idly thumbs off a few bills.

LUCULLUS (CONT'D)
Here's three solidares for thee. Good boy, wink at me, and say thou sawest me not.
(beat)
Fare thee well.

Servilius looks for a moment; then smacks the money out of Lucullus' hand.

LUCULLUS (CONT'D)
Ha! Now I see thou art a fool, and fit for thy master!

Servilius grabs him by the throat and slams him against the wall.

SERVILIUS
May these add to the number that may scald thee! Let molten coin be thy damnation! Thou disease of a friend, and not himself!

Servilius lets Lucullus go, and the two stare at each other for a moment before Servilius stalks out.

EXT. LUCIUS' HOME -- LATER
Flaminius pulls up and sees Lucius washing his car, a boombox playing nearby.
Lucius waves agreeably.


LUCIUS
Flaminius! You are kindly met, sir. Fare thee well.


FLAMINIUS
May it please your honor, my lord has sent--


Lucius stops working.


LUCIUS
Ha! What has he sent? I am so much endeared to that lord; he's ever sending. How shall I thank him, thinkest thou? And what has he sent now?


FLAMINIUS
He only sent his present occasion now, my lord; requesting your lordship to supply his instant use with so many talents.


LUCIUS
I know his lordship is but merry with me.


FLAMINIUS
If his occasion were not virtuous, I should not urge it half so faithfully.


Lucius seems shocked.


LUCIUS
Dost thou speak seriously, Flaminius?


FLAMINIUS
Upon my soul, 'tis true, sir.


Lucius thinks a moment, wiping off his hands with a rag. Then he smiles.


LUCIUS
What a wicked beast was I to disfurnish myself against such a good time, when I might have shown myself honorable! How unluckily it happened, that I should purchase the day before for a little part, and undo a great deal of honored! Flaminius, before the gods, I am not able to do. Commend me bountifully to his good lordship; and I hope his honor will conceive the fairest of me, because I have no power to be kind. Good Flaminius, will you befriend me so far, as to use mine own words to him?


Flaminius takes in the new car, the electronics, the nice clothes, with an eyebrow raised.


FLAMINIUS
Yes, sir, I...shall.


LUCIUS
I'll look you out a good turn, Flaminius.


Lucius goes right back to work. After a moment of dumfounded silence, Flaminius trudges back to his car.

INT. SEMPRONIUS' STUDIO -- LATER
Flavia stands and watches Sempronius stab somewhat ineffectually at a canvas. He barely glances over his shoulder at her.


SEMPRONIUS
Must he need trouble me in it, above all others? He might have tried Lord Lucius or Lucullus; and now Ventidius is wealthy too, whom he redeemed from prison. All these owe their estates unto him.


FLAVIA
My lord, they have all been touched, and found base metal, for they have all denied him.


Now Sempronius seems more interested.


SEMPRONIUS
How! Have they denied him? Has Ventidius and Lucullus denied him? And does he send to me? Three? Hum! It shows but little love or judgment in him. Must I be his last refuge! I'm angry at him, that might have known my place. I see no sense for it, but his occasion might have wooed me first. For, in my conscience, I was the first man that ever received gift from him. And does he think so backwardly of me now, that I'll requite its last?
(beat)
No. So it may prove an argument of laughter to the rest, and amongst lords I be thought a fool. I'd rather than the worth of thrice the sum, had he sent to me first, but for my mind's sake; I'd such a courage to do him good. But now return, and with their faint reply this answer join; who bates mine honor shall not know my coin.


FLAVIA
(snarling)
Excellent! Your lordship's a goodly villain!


She storms out.

EXT. SEMPRONIUS' APARTMENT -- MOMENTS LATER
Flavia's bike is leaning against a light pole. She grabs it, gets on, then thinks a moment.


FLAVIA
This was my lord's best hope; now all are fled, save only the gods.


She puts her foot on the pedal and takes off.


EXT. TIMON'S OFFICE BUILDING -- LATER
Caphis and two other assistants, HORTENSIUS and TITUS, are lounging outside Timon's building when they see Apemantus handing out leaflets nearby.


CAPHIS
Stay, stay, here comes Apemantus; let's have some sport with him.


HORTENSIUS
Hang him, he'll abuse us.


TITUS
A plague upon him, dog!


Caphis sidles up to Apemantus.


CAPHIS
How dost, fool?


APEMANTUS
Dost dialogue with thy shadow?


Caphis butts chests with him.



CAPHIS
Where's the fool now?


Apemantus butts back.


APEMANTUS
He last asked the question. Poor rogues, and usurers' men! Bawds between gold and want!


Hortensius steps up.


HORTENSIUS
What are we, Apemantus?


APEMANTUS
Asses.


HORTENSIUS
Why?


APEMANTUS
That you ask me what you are, and do not know yourselves.


Titus steps up.


TITUS
How dost thou, Apemantus?


APEMANTUS
Would I had a rod in my mouth, that I might answer thee profitably. Go; thou wast born a bastard, and thou't die a bawd.


TITUS
Thou wast whelped a dog, and thou shalt famish a dog's death. Answer not; I am gone.


Titus slinks back to the wall.


APEMANTUS
Even so thou outrunnest grace.


Apemantus looks around. Caphis looks on with hooded eyes, observing Titus' loss of face.


CAPHIS
Thou art not altogether a fool.


APEMANTUS
Nor thou altogether a wise man; as much foolery as I have, so much wit thou lackest.


Apemantus pushes past Caphis and Hortensius and strolls away. The two assistants go back to leaning against the wall, with Titus.


Flaminius arrives on foot. They lift themselves up from where they were leaning.


CAPHIS
(to Hortensius)
Lord Timon's man.
(to Flaminius)
Sir, a word; pray, is my lord ready to come forth?


FLAMINIUS
No, indeed he is not.


CAPHIS
We attend his lordship; pray, signify so much.


FLAMINIUS
I need not tell him that; he knows you are too diligent.


Flaminius disappears inside. Caphis looks at Hortensius and shrugs.
Next they see Servilius coming across the street, taking them both in.


HORTENSIUS
O, here's Servilius; now we shall know some answers.


SERVILIUS
If I might beseech you, gentlemen, to repair some other hour, I should derive much from it; for, take it of my soul, my lord leans wondrously to discontent; his comfortable temper has forsook him; he's much out of health, and keeps his chamber.


CAPHIS
Many do keep their chambers are not sick; and, if it be so far beyond his health, methinks he should the sooner pay his debts, and make a clear way to the gods.


SERVILIUS
(bitterly)
Good gods!


TITUS
We cannot take this for an answer, sir.


Servilius stares them down as he goes past.


A moment later they spot Flavia cycling towards them. She sees them as well, but ignores them and chains her bike up. Hortensius glances at Caphis, then steps up.


HORTENSIUS
By your leave--


Flavia still looks flushed and angry.


FLAVIA
What do ye ask of me, my friend?


HORTENSIUS
We wait for certain money here.


FLAVIA
Aye, if money were as certain as your waiting, 'twere sure enough. Why then preferred you not your sums and bills, when your false masters eat of my lord's meat? Then they could smile and fawn upon his debts and take down the interest into their gluttonous maws. You do yourselves but wrong to stir me up; let me pass quietly.


HORTENSIUS
Aye, but this answer will not serve.


FLAVIA
If 'twill not serve, 'tis not so base as you; for you serve knaves.


Caphis looks on coldly from where he reclines against the wall.


CAPHIS
No matter what; he's poor, and that's revenge enough. Who can speak broader than he that has no house to put his head in? Such may rail against great buildings.


Caphis looks over Flavia's shoulder. She turns and sees several CAMERA CREWS hurrying down the sidewalk towards them.


Flavia ducks her head and slips inside.



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Timon of Athens Pt. 3

In this installment of Shakespeare's TIMON OF ATHENS, the dotcom bubble finally bursts, and Timon begins to realize his excess.

EXT. DEMEAS' OFFICE BUILDING -- DAY
An imposing modern structure.
CG: ONE WEEK LATER.

INT. DEMEAS' OFFICE -- CONTINUOUS
Demeas is sorting through a mound of paperwork at an ornate desk in a comfortable office. Across from him sits his hungry, attentive assistant, CAPHIS, laptop at hand.
From Demeas' point of view, we see the newspaper headline: ATHENS STOCK SINKS. He folds the newspaper over and rubs his scalp.

DEMEAS
And late, five thousand; to Varro and to Isidore he owes nine thousand; besides my former sum, which makes it five and twenty. Still in motion of raging waste? It cannot hold; it will not. If I want gold, steal but a beggar's dog, and give it to Timon. Why, the dog coins gold. If I would sell my horse, and buy twenty more better than he, why, give my horse to Timon--ask nothing, give it to him--it foals me, straight and able horses. No porter at his gate, but rather one that smiles and still invites all that pass by. It cannot hold. No reason can found his state in safety.

Demeas pushes his files away in disgust. He turns his laser gaze to Caphis.

DEMEAS (CONT'D)
Get on your cloak, and haste you to Lord Timon; importune him for my moneys. Be not ceased with slight denial. Tell him my uses cry to me, I must serve my turn out of mine own. His days and times are past, and my reliances on his fracted dates have smit my credit. I love and honor him, but must not break my back to heal his finger.

CAPHIS
I go, sir.

DEMEAS
Get you gone; put on a most importunate aspect, a visage of demand. For, I do fear, when every feather sticks in his own wing, Lord Timon will be left a naked gull, which flashes now a phoenix.

Caphis nods and leaves the office. Demeas spins lazily in his chair and looks out the window, a great view below.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (ANTEROOM) -- LATER
A clock ticks LOUDLY as Caphis stares straight ahead, seated rigidly in a seat in Timon's waiting room, ready to wait it out.
Flavia, from her desk, watches Caphis nervously, and thumbs through the file Caphis has handed her.

FLAVIA
(to herself)
No care, no stop! So senseless of expense, that he will neither know how to maintain it, nor cease his flow of riot. Takes no account how things go from him, nor resumes no care of what is to continue. What shall be done? He will not hear, till feel. I must be round with him. Fie, fie, fie!

Timon saunters in, talking on his cell.

TIMON
So soon as dinner's done, we'll forth again, my Alcibiades.

He hangs up as Caphis stands and takes the files from Flavia's desk.

TIMON (CONT'D)
What is your will?

CAPHIS
My lord, here is a note of certain dues.

Timon hitches a thumb at Flavia.

TIMON
Go to my steward.

CAPHIS
Please it your lordship, she has put me off to the succession of new days this month. My master is awaked by great occasion to call upon his own, and humbly prays you that with your other noble parts you'll suit in giving him his right.

TIMON
Mine honest friend, I prithee, but repair to me next morning.

Caphis tries to stand between Timon and his office door.

CAPHIS
Nay, good my lord--

Timon looks surprised and angry.

TIMON
Contain yourself, good friend!

CAPHIS
If you did not know, my master wants--

TIMON
Give me my breath, I do beseech you, keep on; I'll wait upon you instantly.

Timon glares at Flavia.

TIMON (CONT'D)
Come hither, pray you. How goes the world, that I am not encountered with clamorous demands of date-broke bonds, and the detention of long-since-due debts, against my honor?

Flavia looks cold, but turns and addresses Caphis politely.

FLAVIA
Please you, the time is unagreeable to this business. Your importunacy cease 'till after dinner, that I may make his lordship understand wherefore you are not paid.
(to Timon)
Pray, draw near.

Flavia and Timon disappear into Timon's office, while Caphis reluctantly retreats.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (INNER SANCTUM) -- MOMENTS LATER
Timon, glowering, crosses his arms and looks across the broad expanse of his desk at Flavia.

TIMON
You make me marvel. Wherefore ere this time had you not fully laid my state before me, that I might so have rated my expense, as I had leave of means?

FLAVIA
You would not hear me, at many leisures I proposed.

TIMON
Go to: perchance some single vantages you took, when my indisposition put you back. And that unaptness made you minister, thus to excuse yourself.

Flavia gets angry herself.

FLAVIA
O my good lord, at many times I brought in my accounts, laid them before you. You would throw them off, and say, you found them in mine honesty. When, for some trifling present, you have bid me return so much, I have shook my head and wept. Yea, against the authority of manners, prayed you to hold your hand more close. I did endure not seldom, nor no slight cheques, when I have prompted you in the ebb of your estate, and your great flow of debts. My loved lord, though you hear now, too late--yet now's a time--the greatest of your having lacks a half to pay your present debts.

Timon waves his hand dismissively.

TIMON
Let all my land be sold!

Flavia leans forward, intently.

FLAVIA
'Tis all engaged, some forfeited and gone. And what remains will hardly stop the mouth of present dues. The future comes apace; what shall defend the interim? And, at length, how goes our reckoning?

Timon finally looks a little ill.

TIMON
To Lacedaemon did my land extend.

Flavia softens.

FLAVIA
O my good lord, the world is but a word. Were it all yours to give it in a breath, how quickly were it gone!

Timon slumps.

TIMON
You tell me true.

Flavia is on her feet, pacing.

FLAVIA
If you suspect my husbandry or falsehood, call me before the exactest auditors and set me on the proof. So the gods bless me, when all our offices have been oppressed with riotous feeders, when our vaults have wept with drunken spills of wine, when every room hath blazed with lights and brayed with minstrelsy, I have retired to me a wasteful cock, and set mine eyes at flow.

Timon rubs his scalp.

TIMON
Come, sermon me no further. No villainous bounty yet hath passed my heart; unwisely, not ignobly, have I given. Why dost thou weep? Canst thou the conscience lack, to think I shall lack friends? Secure thy heart. If I would breach the vessels of my love, and try the argument of hearts by borrowing, men and men's fortunes could I frankly use as I can bid thee speak.

FLAVIA
(unconvinced)
Assurance bless your thoughts!

TIMON
And, in some sort, these wants of mine are crowned, that I account them blessings; for by these shall I try friends. You shall perceive how you mistake my fortunes. I am wealthy in my friends.

Timon studies Flavia as he leans forward and picks up his phone.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (HELP DESK) -- CONTINUOUS
Servilius and another tech-head, FLAMINIUS, are tossing a foam ball back in forth between cubicles. A lot of funky personal decorations lend the area a slightly unprofessional air.
Servilius' phone RINGS. He casually picks it up, then straightens.

SERVILIUS
My lord?

He hangs up abruptly, as if scalded. He indicates the door, and both take off at a run.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (HALLWAY) -- MOMENTS LATER
We see the two young employees at a dead run, zooming past other surprised cubicle serfs.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (INNER SANCTUM) -- MOMENTS LATER
Servilius and Flaminius burst in, breathless, trying to straighten their wrinkled polos and Dockers.

Timon gives them a measuring look.

SERVILIUS
My lord!

TIMON
I will dispatch you severally, you to Lord Lucius; to Lord Lucullus, you.
(looks at Flavia)
You, to Sempronius. Commend me to their loves, and--I am proud, say--that my occasions have found time to use them toward a supply of money. Let the request be fifty talents.

FLAMINIUS
As you have said, my lord.

FLAVIA
Lord Lucius and Lucullus? Hum.

Timon glances at her out of the corner of his eye, then looks at her full on.

TIMON
Go you to the senators--of whom, even to the state's best health, I have deserved this hearing--bid them send of the instant a thousand talents to me.

Flavia looks down, considers, then looks back up.

FLAVIA
I have been bold--for that I knew it the most general way--to them to use your signet and your name. But they do shake their heads, and I am here no richer in return.

Timon gets another blow.

TIMON
Is it true? Can it be?

FLAVIA
They answer, in a joint and corporate voice, that now they are at fall, want treasure, cannot do what they would.

The fight goes out of Timon. He looks at Flavia and tries to smile.

TIMON
Prithee, be not sad. Thou art true and honest; ingeniously I speak. No blame belongs to thee.
(thinks)
Ventidius lately buried his father, by whose death he's stepped into a great estate. When he was poor, imprisoned and in scarcity of friends, I cleared him with five talents. Greet him from me, bid him suppose some good necessity touches his friend, which craves to be remembered with those five talents.

Flavia nods and stands up. Flaminius and Servilius exchange glances and start to back out of the office, following her lead.

Timon watches them go, and tries to rally a bit.

TIMON (CONT'D)
Never speak, or think, that Timon's fortunes among his friends can sink.

Flavia pauses at the door.

FLAVIA
I would I could not think it; that thought is bounty's foe. Being free itself, it thinks all others are so.

Flavia shuts the door with finality.


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Timon of Athens Pt. 2

In our next installment of our modern dress, original prose adaptation of TIMON OF ATHENS, we attend a hipster party where Timon's supposed friends, hangers-ons and synchophants all, try to see and be seen, while Flavia and Apemantus try to peel the falsehoods back a bit. Sort of "The Hills," Bill Shakespeare style.

EXT. TIMON'S HOUSE -- EVENING
We see Timon's sprawling, upscale home, as sleek new-model cars pull into the long circular driveway.
A clot of photogs and reporters are shooting arrivals, and there is the general buzz of paparazzi activity.
The trendy see-and-be-seen types are standing around the lawn in studied poses, among them gliteratti like LUCIUS, LUCULLUS, SEMPRONIUS, and VENTIDIUS.
Out of the range of the lights, but not too far out, Ventidius is crouched over his laptop on a bench as Sempronius saunters up, a canvas tucked under his arm. This pair are both young rich guys with inheritances affecting the look of the noble poor. Sempronius is the more flamboyant of the two, Ventidius tries the poet's glower instead.

SEMPRONIUS
I have not seen you long; how goes the world?

VENTIDIUS
(coolly)
It wears, sir, as it grows.

SEMPRONIUS
You are rapt, sir, in some work, some dedication to the great lord.

VENTIDIUS
(airily)
A thing slipped idly from me. What have you there?

SEMPRONIUS
A picture, sir. When comes your book forth?

VENTIDIUS
Upon the heels of my presentment, sir. Let's see your piece.

Sempronius makes a showy display of an adequately rendered image of Timon.

SEMPRONIUS
'Tis a good piece.

VENTIDIUS
So 'tis, this comes off well and excellent.

SEMPRONIUS
(airily)
Indifferent.

VENTIDIUS
I will say of it, it tutors nature; artificial strife lives in these touches, livelier than life.

Timon is at the door, drink in hand, greeting people and ushering them in. He spies Sempronius and Ventidius and approaches, smiling. Ventidius stands and shuts his laptop.

VENTIDIUS (CONT'D)
Vouchsafe my labor, and long live your lordship!

TIMON
I thank you; you shall hear from me anon. Go not away.
(to Sempronius)
What have you there, my friend?

SEMPRONIUS
A piece of painting, which I do beseech your lordship to accept.

TIMON
Painting is welcome.

Timon sizes it up.

TIMON (CONT'D)
I like your work; and you shall find I like it. Wait attendance till you hear further from me.

SEMPRONIUS
The gods preserve ye!

TIMON
Well fare you, gentlemen. Give me your hand, we must dine together.

The three men head inside.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) -- LATER
Everyone is enjoying drinks and leisure.
Suddenly Apemantus is in the door. He has on an oversized shirt, baggy pants, a bandanna, a glaring contrast to everyone else; and gradually the conversation tapers off and everyone stares.
Except Timon, who greets his oldest friend with a bright smile.

TIMON
Look, who comes here! Good morrow to thee, gentle Apemantus!

Apemantus looks around the room.

APEMANTUS
Till I be gentle, stay thou for thy good morrow; when thou art Timon's dog, and these knaves honest.

TIMON
Why dost thou call them knaves? Thoust knowest them not.

APEMANTUS
Are they not Athenians?

TIMON
Yes.

APEMANTUS
Then I repent not.

Lucullus juts out his chin. He is a former college football star and party boy whose glory days are on the slow decline.

LUCULLUS
You know me, Apemantus?

APEMANTUS
Thou knowest I do; I called thee by thy name.

Timon LAUGHS, breaking the uneasy silence.

TIMON
Thou art proud, Apemantus.

APEMANTUS
Of nothing so much as that I am not like Timon.

Apemantus turns to go, but Timon steps forward.

TIMON
Whither art going?

APEMANTUS
To knock out an honest Athenian's brains.

TIMON
That's a deed thou'lt die for.

APEMANTUS
Right...if doing nothing be death by the law.

Timon tries to distract his surly friend by grabbing Sempronius' painting, now propped up on a chair.

TIMON
How likest this picture, Apemantus?

APEMANTUS
The best, for the innocence.

TIMON
Wrought he not well that painted it?

APEMANTUS
He wrought better than made the painter; and yet he's but a filthy piece of work.

Sempronius is ready to throw down.

SEMPRONIUS
You're a dog.

APEMANTUS
Thy mother's of my generation; what's she, if I be a dog?

Timon intervenes.

TIMON
Will thy dine with me, Apemantus?

APEMANTUS
No, I eat not lords.

TIMON
(grins)
And thou shouldst, thou'dst anger ladies.

APEMANTUS
Oh, they eat lords; so they come by great bellies.

Timon cracks up.

TIMON
That's a lascivious apprehension!

APEMANTUS
So thou apprehend'st it; take it for thy labor.

Apemantus goes and slouches against a wall.

EXT. STREETS -- CONTINUOUS
We see bright, pretty Flavia energetically cycling down the road on an old-fashioned bike.

EXT. TIMON'S HOUSE -- CONTINUOUS
Flavia comes biking up, her purse in a little basket on the handlebars. She carefully leans the old-fashioned fendered bike and carefully smoothes her dress and hair.
She looks up and the great house and swallows, then ventures in.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
Flavia stands in the doorway, slightly flushed, looking around, excited, thinking it is her Cinderella moment.
But nobody, especially not her boss, even look up. Everyone is talking in little sullen knots.
A little crestfallen, Flavia sidles along the wall herself.
Apemantus spots Ventidius whispering something to Sempronius, and they SNICKER and tap knuckles.

APEMANTUS
How now, poet?

VENTIDIUS
How now, philosopher.

APEMANTUS
Thou liest.

VENTIDIUS
Art not one?

APEMANTUS
Yes.

VENTIDIUS
Then I lie not.

APEMANTUS
Art not a poet?

VENTIDIUS
Yes.

APEMANTUS
Then thou liest. Look in thy last work, where thou hast feigned him a worthy fellow.

He juts a thumb at Timon, who stands grinning, enjoying his friend's jabs.

VENTIDIUS
That's not feigned; he is so.

APEMANTUS
Yes, he is worthy of thee, and to pay thee for thy labor. He that loves to be flattered is worthy of the flatterer. Heavens, that I were a lord!

TIMON
What would you do then, Apemantus?

APEMANTUS
Ever as Apemantus does now; hate a lord with my heart.

TIMON
What, thyself?

APEMANTUS
Aye.

TIMON
Wherefore?

APEMANTUS
That I had no angry wit to be a lord.

ALCIBIADES strolls in, his stunning date TIMANDRA on his arm. Alcibiades is a sharp dresser, and sharp-eyed, a shark. He is older, as seen by his silver brush cut, and the set of his lantern jaw shows that he's been in a few boardroom battles. He is Timon's CFO.

TIMON
Most welcome sir!

APEMANTUS
All this courtesy! The strain of man's bred out into baboon and monkey.

Alcibiades shakes Timon's hand, and he beams back.

ALCIBIADES
Sir, you have saved my longing, and I feed most hungrily on your sight.

TIMON
Right welcome, sir! Ere we depart, we'll share a bounteous time in different pleasures. Pray you, let us in.

Timon and Alcibiades begin to lead the others into the dining room.
Apemantus looks on sourly. Lucius slips close. Lucius is another night-side player, a clubber, in flashy clothes.

LUCIUS
What time of day is it, Apemantus?

ALCIBIADES
Time to be honest.

LUCIUS
(looks slyly)
That time serves still.

APEMANTUS
The more accursed thou, that still omit'st it.

Lucullus passes them.

LUCULLUS
(coldly)
Thou art going to Lord Timon's feast?

Apemantus thinks, then lifts his slumped shoulders from the wall and straightens.

APEMANTUS
Aye, to see meat fill knaves and wine heat fools.

LUCULLUS
(waves him off)
Fare thee well, fare thee well.

APEMANTUS
Thou art a fool to bid me farewell twice.

LUCULLUS
Why, Apemantus?

APEMANTUS
Shouldst have kept one to thyself, for I mean to give thee none.

Lucius and Lucullus crowd him in, blocking his access to the dining room.

LUCIUS
Hang thyself!

APEMANTUS
No, I will do nothing at thy bidding. Make thy requests to thy friend.

LUCULLUS
Away, unpeacable dog, or I'll spurn thee hence!

APEMANTUS
I will fly, like a dog, the heels of the ass!

Apemantus shoulders past them, and Lucullus makes his move; but Lucius holds him back.

LUCIUS
He's opposite to humanity. Come, shall we in, and taste Lord Timon's bounty? He outgoes the very heart of kindness.

LUCULLUS
He pours it out; Echecratides, the god of gold, is but his steward. Long may he live in fortunes! Shall we in?

LUCIUS
I'll keep you company.

They head into the dining room.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (DINING ROOM) -- LATER
Timon sits at the head of a long, fine dining table, set out with china and crystal and candles flickering off of all.
To his right is Alcibiades; his left, alarmingly, is Apemantus. On down the line we see Timandra, Ventidius, Sempronius, Lucius, Lucullus, Varro, the solemn business-like ISIDORE, the hawkeyed lawyer DEMEAS, and others, with Flavia way at the end. Isidore is a severe older woman who looks like she brooks no argument. Demeas is older as well, with piercing eyes and manicured hands.
Sempronius and Ventidius are whispering between themselves. After an elbow from Sempronius, Ventidius stands, and pulls out his checkbook from an inner pocket on his dinner jacket.

VENTIDIUS
Most honored Timon, it hath pleased the gods to remember my father's age, and call him to long peace. He is gone happy, and has left me rich. Then, as in grateful virtue I am bound to your free heart, I do return those talents, doubled with thanks and service, from whose help I derived liberty.

TIMON
Oh, by no means, honest Ventidius. You mistake my love; I gave it freely ever, and there's none can truly say he gives, if he receives.

Ventidius' checkbook disappears in a flash.

VENTIDIUS
A noble spirit!

He sits down abruptly, casting a sidelong glance at Sempronius. Timon stands, glass in hand, and suddenly they all stand and follow suit.

TIMON
Nay, my lords. Ceremony was but devised at first to set a gloss on faint deeds, hollow welcomes, recanting goodness, sorry ere 'tis shown. But where there is true friendship, there needs none. Pray, sit; more welcome are ye to my fortunes than my fortunes to me.

Lucius takes a big swallow.

LUCIUS
My lord, we always have confessed it!

APEMANTUS
Ho, ho, confessed it? Hanged it, have you not?

Lucius glowers, but Timon LAUGHS.

TIMON
O, Apemantus, you are welcome!

APEMANTUS
No. You shall not make me welcome. I come to have thee thrust me out of doors.

TIMON
Fie, thou art a churl; ye've got a humor there does not become a man. Go, let him have a table by himself, for he does neither affect company, nor is he fit for it, indeed.

APEMANTUS
I come to observe; I give thee warning on it.

TIMON
I take no heed of thee; prithee, let my meat make thee silent.

APEMANTUS
I scorn thy meat; 'twould choke me, for I should never flatter thee.
(looks around the table)
O you gods, what a number of men eat Timon, and he sees 'em not! It grieves me to see so many dip their meat in one man's blood; and all the madness is, he cheers them up too. I wonder men dare trust themselves with men. Methinks they should invite them without knives; good for their meat, and safer for their lives.

The first platters of dinner, rich meats and sauces, crisp salads, steaming soups, begin to appear from the kitchen in the hands of Timon's SERVANTS. Wine is poured, Timon first.

TIMON
My lord, in heart; and let the health go round.

Lucullus, eyes wide, reaches to intercept a glass.

LUCULLUS
Let it flow this way, my good lord!

Lucullus chugs down a glass in a couple of hard swallows.

APEMANTUS
Flow this way! A brave fellow! He keeps his tides well. Those healths will make thee and thy state look ill, Timon.

Apemantus stands and holds his palms pressed together in mock piety. Everybody looks at each other, eyes full of questions.

APEMANTUS (CONT'D)
Apemantus' grace.
(clears his throat)
Immortal gods, I crave no pelf. I pray for no man but myself. Grant I may never prove so fond, to trust man on his oath or bond. Or a harlot, for her weeping; or a dog, that seems a-sleeping; or a keeper, for my freedom; or my friends, if I should need 'em. Amen.

Everyone looks at Apemantus, dumbfounded. He gestures, arms wide.

APEMANTUS (CONT'D)
Fall to it. Rich men sin, and I eat root.

Everyone falls to it.
Sempronius, Ventidius, Lucullus, Lucius all start piling their plates full and really digging in.
We see Demeas and Isidore picking at their plates. Demeas seems to be counting up the cost of this dinner in his head.
Timon notices Alcibiades seems lost in thought.

TIMON
Captain Alcibiades, your heart is in the field now.

ALCIBIADES
My heart is ever at your service, my lord.

TIMON
You had rather be at a breakfast of enemies than a dinner of friends.

ALCIBIADES
So they were bleeding new, my lord, there's no meat like 'em. I could wish my best friend at such a feast.

APEMANTUS
Would all those flatterers were thine enemies then, that then thou mightst kill 'em and bid me to 'em!

Lucius pointedly ignores Apemantus.

LUCIUS
Might we but have that happiness, my lord, that you would once use our hearts, whereby we might express some part of our zeals, we should think ourselves forever perfect.

TIMON
O, no doubt, my good friends, but the gods themselves have provided that I shall have much help from you; how had you been my friends else? Why have you that charitable title from thousands, did not you chiefly belong to my heart? I have told more of you to myself than you can with modesty speak in your own behalf; and thus far I confirm you. Why, I have often wished myself poorer, that I might come nearer to you.

Sempronius and Ventidius elbow each other surreptitiously.

TIMON (CONT'D)
O, what a precious comfort 'tis, to have so many, like brothers, commanding one another's fortunes! Mine eyes cannot hold out water, methinks; so forget their faults, I drink to you.

Everyone raises their glasses.

APEMANTUS
Thou weepest to make them drink, Timon.

Ventidius raises his glass a second time.

VENTIDIUS
Joy had the like conception in our eyes, and at that instant like a babe sprung up!

APEMANTUS
Ho ho! I think that babe a bastard.

SEMPRONIUS
I promise you, lord, you moved me much.

APEMANTUS
(mocking)
Much!

Sempronius flinches. Timon turns his attention to the end of the table.

TIMON
Flavia.

Flavia brightens.

FLAVIA
My lord?

TIMON
The little casket bring me hither.

Flavia looks over her shoulder and sees a shipping box sitting on a low table behind her.
She picks it up and brings it to Timon, her face a mix of emotions, largely crestfallen. Timon lifts out a dozen little gift boxes and begins to pass them down.

TIMON (CONT'D)
O my friends, I have one word to say to you. Look you, my good lord, I must entreat you, honor me so much as to advance this jewel. Accept it and wear it.

Apemantus doesn't take one, but just keeps passing. Lucius rips into his, and sees a gold watch.
We see Varro, Demeas, and Isidore looking on with some disapproval.

LUCIUS
I am so far already in your gifts!

Lucullus is already putting his on his wrist.

LUCULLUS
(dryly)
So are we all.

Flavia looks on with some amazement. She leans down to talk quietly in Timon's ear.

FLAVIA
I beseech your honor, vouchsafe me a word; it does concern you near.

TIMON
Near! Why, then, another time I'll hear thee. I prithee, let's be provided to show them entertainment.

FLAVIA
(to herself)
I scarcely know how.

Flavia strides from the room rather quickly.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (HALLWAY) -- CONTINUOUS
Flavia picks up her stride, her face red. She veers off into the bathroom and shuts the door.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (BATHROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
Flavia sits on the edge of the tub, her elbows on her knees, her face in her hands.

FLAVIA
What will this come to? He commands us to provide, and give great gifts, and all out of an empty coffer. Nor will he know his purse, or yield me this, to show him what a beggar his heart is. Being of no power to make his wishes good, his promises fly so beyond his state that what he speaks is all in debt. He owes for every word; he is so kind that he now pays interest for it. His land's put to their books. Well, would I were gently put out of office before I were forced out! Happier is he that has no friend to feed than such that do even enemies exceed.
(beat)
I bleed inwardly for my lord.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (DINING ROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
In the dining room, Timon is still passing out gifts.

TIMON
Here, my lord, a trifle of our love.

VENTIDIUS
With more than common thanks I will receive it.

Sempronius claps eyes on Ventidius' gift and simpers.

SEMPRONIUS
O, he's the very soul of bounty!

Timon beams at Sempronius.

TIMON
And now I remember, my good lord, you have good words the other day of a bay courser I rode on; it is yours, because you liked it.

SEMPRONIUS
O, none so welcome!

TIMON
I take all and your several visitations so kind to heart. 'Tis not enough to give. Methinks, I could deal kingdoms to my friends, and never be weary.
(gestures broadly)
Lights, more lights!

Demeas leans over and whispers something in Varro's ear.

Lucius raises another full glass.

LUCIUS
The best of happiness, honor and fortunes keep with you, Lord Timon!

Timon nods indulgently.

TIMON
Ready for his friends.

Apemantus looks like he got punched in the stomach.

APEMANTUS
What a coil's here! Serving of becks and jutting-out of bums! I doubt whether their legs be worth the sums that are given for 'em. Friendship's full of dregs. Methinks false hearts should never have sound legs, thus honest fools lay out their wealth in courtesies.

TIMON
(laughs)
Now, Apemantus, if thou were not sullen, I would be good to thee!

APEMANTUS
No, I'll nothing. For if I should be bribed too, there would be none left to rail upon thee; and then thou wouldst sin the faster. Thou givest so long, Timon, I fear me thou wilt give away thyself in paper shortly. What need these feasts, pomps, and vain-glories?

Finally Timon begins to lose patience.

TIMON
Nay, and you begin to rail on society once, I am sworn not to give regard to you. Farewell; and come with better music.

Apemantus, his mouth set in a bitter line, pushes himself away from the table and walks out, Timon watching his retreating back. In a moment, he follows.

INT. TIMON'S HOUSE (HALLWAY) -- MOMENTS LATER
Timon catches up to Apemantus and puts a hand on his shoulder. Apemantus whirls.

APEMANTUS
So: Thou wilt not hear me now. Thou shalt not then. I'll lock thy heaven from thee. O, that men's ears should be to counsel deaf, but not to flattery!

Apemantus storms out.


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.

Timon of Athens Pt. 1

The first installment of TIMON OF ATHENS, my original prose, modern dress adaptation of possibly Shakespeare's most obscure play. Here, I start in typical b-movie fashion my moving one of the most interesting scenes to the front and adding some balls-out action. We also meet Timon's childhood pal Apemantus, who I envisioned as a skatepunk, and Timon's loyal assitant Flavia, who had a gender change to make some of her slavish devotion have a subtext in this modern interpretation. In this opening salvo, we see how Timon's dotcom success led to his free spending ways.

FADE IN:
EXT. DOWNTOWN -- DAY
BLACK. An ALARM begins, growing LOUDER.

Suddenly, FIVE SHOTS ring out; each is punctuated with a letter: T I M O N.

A SIREN begins to HOWL, growing LOUDER as we read CREDITS and watch an eventual fade up from black to see two bandits, BLEPSIAS and GNIPHON, running down an alley. They have masks and weapons and are clutching bags stuffed with cash.

THEME MUSIC BLASTS as we see them sprint into a narrow parking lot between tall buildings and briefly touch fists before getting into their car and PEELING OUT.

EXT. STREETS -- MOMENTS LATER
We see their low-slung slab of Detroit steel purring down the streets, the SIRENS and ALARMS fading away.
We see Blepsias clutching the steering wheel and bearing down on the gas.

EXT. CITYSCAPE -- LATER
The sedan Blepsias is driving is leaving the city behind.
We see their masks fly out the window and land unceremoniously on the side of the road.

EXT. COUNTRY ROADS -- LATER
The pair of bandits is beginning to look more relaxed as they make their way through the rolling hills and countryside.
Before long Blepsias points out the window, then guides his car to the side of the road near a woods. The engine growls once more and is shut off.
Both bandits emerge, carrying their bags of loot, and turn to the trunk.
Gniphon lifts a shovel out of the trunk, and both of them head for the woods.

EXT. WOODS -- LATER
We see that Gniphon has made pretty good headway turning over dirt for a good-sized hole. He glances up at Blepsias, wiping sweat, who is idly watching with his pistol tucked casually in his pants. Blepsias inclines his head as if to tell his partner to keep working. He has his foot resting on the bags of loot. Both pairs of eyes stray there.
Gniphon grits his teeth and keeps going.
When we next see the hole, he's made good time. Blepsias stands with his feet on the edge, peering over, gauging its worthiness.
Gniphon takes a half-step back and, in a swift move, brings the flat of the shovel down on the back of his partner's head with a mighty THWACK.
Blepsias stumbles and turns, and Gniphon swings for the bleachers and nearly twists Blepsias' head around with his second blow. His nerveless fingers reach for his gun as he falls into the hole.
Gniphon drops the shovel quickly and lopes over to sweep up the ill-gotten gain in his arms.
We see Blepsias' shaking hand rise up, pistol in his grip, sighting for his betrayer.
Gniphon gets shot between the shoulder blades and drops to his knees, stunned.
The loot spills out onto the grass, and, caught by the wind, flies away, in singles and bunches.
We watch the bills float lazily this way and that, get caught in branches and bushes on their new path, spreading out through the woods.
Suddenly, a hand plucks a bill from a tree and looks at it.

We see TIMON, young and handsome, but dirty and bedraggled, as if he has been living out of doors for some time. His face cracks into a wide, cold, smile. He grasps the money in his fist and looks into the distance. His voice comes out slowly, a rasp, then begins to build in force.

TIMON
Matrons...turn incontinent. Obedience...fail in children. Slave and fools, pluck the grave wrinkled senate from the bench, and minister in their steads! Convert of the instant, green virginity, do it in your parents' eyes! Bankrupts, hold fast; rather than render back, out with your knives, and cut your trusters' throats! Bound servants, steal! Large-handed robbers your grave masters are, and pill by law. Maid, to thy master's bed; thy mistress is of the brothel! Son of sixteen, pluck the crutch from thy old limping sire...with it beat out his brains! Piety, and fear, religion to the gods, peace, justice, truth, domestic awe, night-rest, and neighborhood...Instruction, manners, mysteries, and trades, degrees, observances, customs, and laws, decline to your confounding contraries, and let confusion live!

Timon slinks back into the woods as the rest of the CREDITS ROLL.

EXT. TIMON'S OFFICE BUILDING -- LATER
A huge glass-and-chrome building, dominating the cityscape.
CG: ATHENS-OS HQ: ONE MONTH EARLIER

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (HALLWAY) -- DAY
We see a fresher, brighter-looking Timon, in crisp professional dress, striding down an office hall. Timon looks like the young, newly-rich CEO of a suddenly booming tech start-up, which he is. Trying to keep up is FLAVIA, his young assistant, also dressed professionally but with a trendy air. She is juggling sheaves of papers, he is tucking his sleek cell phone away.

TIMON
Imprisoned is he, say you?

FLAVIA
Ay, my good lord; five talents is his debt, his means most short, his creditors most strait: Your honorable letter he desires to those who have shut him up; which failing, periods his comfort.

TIMON
Noble Ventidius! Well, I am not of that feather to shake off my friend when he must need me. I do know him a gentleman that well deserves a help.
(beat)
Which he shall have. I'll pay the debt, and free him.

FLAVIA
Your lordship ever binds him.

TIMON
Commend me to him; I will send his ransom; and being enfranchised, bid him come to me. 'Tis not enough to help the feeble up, but to support him after. Fare you well.

FLAVIA
All happiness to your honor!

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (ANTEROOM) -- CONTINUOUS
Timon and Flavia enter and see VARRO, an older, distinguished man, a venture capitalist and a member of Timon's board of directors; SERVILIUS, one of Timon's tech gurus; and an attractive young woman, Varro's daughter EVANTHE, all waiting paitently in a well-appointed anteroom. Varro stands up.

VARRO
Lord Timon, hear me speak!

TIMON
Freely, good father.

Flavia peels off and sits at her desk, picking up the phone, while Timon nods at the trio and ushers them through the heavily-paneled door beyond Flavia's little desk.

INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (INNER SANCTUM) -- CONTINUOUS
We see Timon's lush, dark-wooded and tastefully-furnished inner office. It features a bar, a wide-screen plasma TV, nice furniture, muted but expensive-looking paintings.
Timon takes his place behind a massive oak desk and kicks his feet up, nudging an XBox off to the side.
Servilius and the young woman smile, but Varro looks flustered.

VARRO
This fellow here, Lord Timon, this thy creature, by night frequents my house. I am a man that from my first have been inclined to thrift; and my estate deserves an heir more raised than one which holds a trencher.

Timon glances back and forth between Servilius and Varro.

TIMON
Well, what further?

VARRO
Only one daughter have I, no kin else, on whom I may confer what I have got. The maid is fair, o' the youngest for a bride, and I have bred her at my dearest cost in qualities of the best. This man of thine attempts her love. I prithee, noble lord, join with me to forbid him her resort; myself have spoke in vain.

Timon seems surprised.

TIMON
The man is honest.

VARRO
Therefore he will be, Timon. His honesty rewards him in itself; it must not bear my daughter.
Timon looks steadily at the young couple.

TIMON
Does she love him?

VARRO
She is young and apt. Our own precedent passions do instruct us what levity's in youth.
Timon looks directly at Servilius.

TIMON
Love you the maid?

SERVILIUS
Ay, my good lord, and she accepts of it.

VARRO
If in her marriage my consent be missing, I call the gods to witness, I will choose mine heir from forth the beggars of the world, and dispossess her all.

Timon raises an eyebrow.

TIMON
How shall she be endowed, if she be mated with an equal husband?

VARRO
Three talents on the present; in future, all.

TIMON
This gentleman of mine hath served me long; to build his fortune, I will strain a little, for 'tis a bond in men. Give him thy daughter what you bestow, in him I'll counterpoise, and make him weigh with her.

Varro is stunned, as is the young couple.

VARRO
Most noble lord, pawn me to this your honor, she is his.

Timon stands up, grinning, and offers Servilius his hand.

TIMON
My hand to thee; mine honor on my promise.

SERVILIUS
Humbly I thank your lordship; never may the state or fortune fall into my keeping, which is not owed to you!

Varro, his daughter, and Servilius all exit, the younger people beaming, the elder less so.

EXT. TIMON'S OFFICE BUILDING -- MOMENTS LATER
Servilius bids his farewell to his future bride and father-in-law at the door of Timon's massive glass-and-chrome building, then turns to go back to work with a wave.

APEMANTUS, a handsome but hot-blooded radical, roughly Timon's age, comes strolling down the sidewalk, handing out pamphlets to passersby. He is bearded, has an old army jacket on, ragged jeans, faded t-shirt.

Varro catches him out of the corner of his eye and his face clouds, but he doesn't lose a step.
Apemantus stops in front of the imposing front of Timon's office.

From Apemantus' POV we look up, and up, and up, at Timon's spire, reaching into the bright blue sky.

CUT TO:
INT. TIMON'S OFFICE (ANTEROOM) -- LATER
Timon strides past Flavia, a dress coat draped over one arm, a briefcase swinging from the other. Flavia is talking on the phone, but cups the receiver and calls out to Timon.
FLAVIA
'Tis Alcibiades, and some twenty horse, all of companionship.
Timon's face breaks into a wide smile.
TIMON
Pray, entertain them; give them guide to us.
Timon strides out.

EXT. TIMON'S OFFICE BUILDING -- MOMENTS LATER
Apemantus looks gloomily at Timon's building.
He fishes in his ragged pants and pulls out a snapshot.
From Apemantus' point of view, we see it is an old photo of a younger Timon and Apemantus, in full skatepunk regalia, boards over their shoulders, giving the camera the thumbs up.
A moment later, Timon--driving a flashy sportscar--roars out of the parking garage adjacent and zooms past.
Apemantus watches Timon's taillights disappear.
A gust of wind in the car's wake blows a newspaper against Apemantus' leg. He absently plucks it off, but then the headline draws his attention.
From his POV we see the headline: ATHENS-OS FLOATS IPO TODAY. Below it, a subheading reads: "CEO Hosts Celebration Tonight."
Apemantus, thinking, carefully folds the newspaper and tucks it in a pocket; then follows down the sidewalk in Timon's wake.

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